Friday, Apr. 25, 2008 9:16 p.m.
since retirement mum has been spending her mornings and weekends on flowers. yesterday morning she said to me, "老公你睇下d花幾靚？" is it la nina effect? it's so damn cold in kwai hing. difficult to gather energy and concentrate these days. is it because of the weather or M or something else? can't give myself up like that... honesty or honesty to oneself. something that i've always overlooked. perhaps i'm not as honest as i thought afterall. pride and prejudice. how stupid i was to have underestimated people and overestimated myself. to somebody who's struggling in studio: hold on hold on! let's go taking pics together later ok? How I wish I could surrender my soul;
Shed the clothes that become my skin;
See the liar that burns within my needing.
How I wish I'd chosen darkness from cold.
How I wish I had screamed out loud,
Instead I've found no meaning. I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain. How I wish I could walk through the doors of my mind;
Hold memory close at hand,
Help me understand the years.
How I wish I could choose between Heaven and Hell.
How I wish I would save my soul.
I'm so cold from fear. I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.
Far, far away; find comfort in pain.
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain. |