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Wednesday, Mar. 16, 2011 12:59 p.m.

總是睡得不好,凌晨四點就被外面的鳥兒吵醒,也總是徘徊半睡半醒之間。有一晚在夢中以為自己曾經跟指揮先生上床(沒有任何性愛場面,只是夢中的自己有這樣的認知而已),醒來認真地想了很久,還嘗試用「如果做過應該會見過他的肚腩但我從來沒見過」的理由替自己辯護,過了幾分鐘才意識到只是一場夢。

大概是為了功課感到有壓力吧,還有床褥太軟,醒來總是很累。

前晚到soho curzon看挪威的森林,可能因為我並不喜歡原著亦不記得小說情節,我覺得電影拍得很好。唯一要挑剔的是阿綠的選角和戲份不足,但直子比記憶中可愛得多。不過即使看完電影版,我仍然無法理解挪威的森林大受歡迎的原因。村上的其他小說無長短篇我都很喜歡,唯獨這一本我認為最難下咽。要說保留村上的感覺的話,早幾年的東尼瀧谷就很好,因為改編自短篇,電影的發揮空間就大得多。同行的朋友提起改編自生命中不能承受之輕的布拉格之春,我沒看過,也無法想像這樣欠缺劇情的小說如何能變成電影,難道要用旁白解釋巴門尼德?

之前說的壓力就是這樣來的。關於在城市中步行與它的「翻譯」方式,即是藝術家如何將他們本人步行的經驗帶給觀眾(例如化成路線圖或者拍照/video做紀錄),我覺得自己還是讀/想得不夠,也抓不住重點。另一方面,作品像有它們自己的意志一般,像要脫離自己的思想範圍,擔心的是觀眾無法看出這許多作品中共同的命題(畢竟所有的步行作品都只能是步行的representation/evidence/documentation)。

A Postal Service cover by the Shins. The music sounds merry, but the song is actually about nuclear explosion.

I've got a cupboard with cans of food,
filtered water, and pictures of you
and I'm not coming out until this is all over.
And I'm looking through the glass
Where the light bends at the cracks
And I'm screaming at the top of my lungs
Pretending the echoes belong to someone
Someone I used to know

And we become silhouettes when our bodies finally go
ba ba ba ba

I wanted to walk through the empty streets
And feel something constant under my feet,
But all the news reports recommended that I stay indoors
Because the air outside will make
Our cells divide at an alarming rate
Until our shells simply cannot hold
All our insides in,
And that's when we'll explode
(And it won't be a pretty sight)

And we'll become silhouettes when our bodies finally go
ba ba ba ba

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